Fatherless Time
Seconds before they lowered my father’s
casket into the ground, the boyish-handed
man from the crackerjack funeral home team
directed me to place my boutonniere on the lid.
I did. But he didn’t see me strip my metaphorical
watch and place it there too. I doubt anyone did.
I’m learning now to live on fatherless time—a
zone that knows nothing of designations such
as Mountain or Central or Greenwich Mean.
Time’s told here by the luminescence of intent.
The only ticking I must pay attention to comes
from my metaphorical but also literal chest as
my father’s ghost voice says “This is your time now.”
Still feel it with my Dad now 17 years gone….
Eagles’ “It’s Your World Now” is worth a listen… He is speaking to you for sure—mine still does
Wonderful writing!
(you are living grief in beauty)
Phew! So right.
Oh my! All of your writings concerning your Father’s death have been so right on and heartfelt. Grieving a parent no matter your age, or their age, is very hard. “Fatherless/Motherless Time” perfect description. Endless adjustment. Praying for peace and comfort.
Christine, I so agree with you. I look forward to reading John’s blog’s. His dad was my cousin and John without knowing it, is helping me cope with David’s passing. I miss David’s text and email’s..
Oh John I am so thrilled to see this heartfelt message – – Not that I count but I feel you are feeling your Dad’s message and love in a way of such beauty and helping others. God bless You and Yours Shawn and his and the Rose Miss Anna Judy
Time is such an odd concept/experience/measuremenr-even more so in grief.
I lost my dad January 3rd. Your writing puts words to my feelings. Thank you for sharing.
Mercy to you, John.
I wonder what color and pattern of Pendleton blanket will buffet you in this, your time.